bul·ly·cide noun \ˈbül-e-ˌsīd\ the cause of another person’s death as the direct result of bullying.
The term “bullycide,” as we see it, can just as easily be akin to “homicide” as it is to “suicide.” Whether a death is self-inflicted or other-inflicted, if a person dies as the result of bullying, the outcome has the same cause: one or more bullies.
With that in mind, we remember these young people whose lives have been destroyed by bullies.
In New York, West Islip High School senior Alexis Pilkington was a popular 17-year-old and a well-liked athlete who had already landed a soccer scholarship to college.
But none of that stopped Alexis from becoming the target of nasty online comments – even after the Long Island girl committed suicide.
One person wrote, “She was obviously a stupid depressed [girl]– who deserved to kill herself. she got what she wanted. be happy for her death. rejoice in it.”
In Connecticut, 18 year-old, Allison Owen was stabbed in a Windsor Bank parking lot and died early on a Thursday evening at St. Francis Hospital.
Her ex-boyfriend, Marqz Robotham, 18, has been charged with murder. Police say the two graduated from Windsor High School, lived together in Hartford and had recently ended their romantic relationship.
Online, the condolences come from people who knew the 18-year-old since she was in elementary school.
On the morning of February 14th, (Valentine’s Day), April Himes was told by her Middle School; Go to school (where she had been teased, harassed and taunted by classmates) or appear before a truancy board and maybe go to “juvie” jail.
April made another choice. An hour after the phone call with Carmichael Middle School, April hung herself in her bedroom, leaving a devastated and grief stricken family behind.
April’s community was left with grief, but also with questions about how such a kind gentle girl could feel so hopeless in her pain, and how could April be so forgotten by her school.
Prior to her suicide, April had missed 53 days of school and attempted suicide once before, using pills. April’s parents had found her counseling but without the harassment ending at her school there was no resolving her basic problem, “bully peers”.
Asher Brown’s worn-out tennis shoes still sit in the living room of his Cypress-area home while his student progress report — filled with straight A’s — rests on the coffee table.
The eighth-grader shot himself in the head after enduring what his mother and stepfather say was constant harassment from four other students at Hamilton Middle School in the Cypress-Fairbanks Independent School District.
Asher, his family said, was “bullied to death” — picked on for his small size, his religion and because he did not wear designer clothes and shoes.
Kids also accused him of being gay, some of them performing mock gay acts on him in his physical education class, his mother and stepfather said.
The 13-year-old’s parents said they had complained about the bullying to Hamilton Middle School officials for 18 months, but claimed their concerns fell on deaf ears.
Billy (William) Lucas, who was a student at Greensburg (IN) Community High School, was found hanging in a family owned barn on a Thursday evening. He was 15 years old. Though he apparently said nothing about it in his suicide note, many say he was the victim of a years-long campaign of bullying at the hands of some of his classmates. Schoolmates said that even on the day of his death, certain students told Billy to kill himself.
In particular, it is reported that Billy was subjected to taunts about his perceived sexual orientation [but] Billy never self-identified as being gay.
“People would call him ‘fag’ and stuff like that, just make fun of him because he’s different basically,” said student Dillen Swango. “They said stuff like ‘you’re like a piece of crap’ and ‘you don’t deserve to live.’ Different things like that. Talked about how he was gay or whatever.”
“He was threatened to get beat up every day,” friend and classmate Nick Hughes said. “Sometimes in classes, kids would act like they were going to punch him and stuff and push him…. He would try to [defend himself] but people would just try to break him down with words and stuff and just pick on him.”
A former student said he was 14 when he overdosed after being bullied.”I got picked on and bullied because I was gay,” the student said. “I took a handful of pills one night, and the only difference is I got to live and Billy didn’t.”
Bobby Tillman, 18, was simply walking to a house party in Douglasville, Ga., an Atlanta suburb. He didn’t know that four men at the party had gotten into a fight with another group outside the gathering, and that one of the troublemakers said that the next man who came along would feel his wrath.
That next man was Tillman. The group punched and stomped Bobby to death in an unprovoked attack. According to investigators, he was stomped so severely, his heart was lacerated.
“Every time I close my eyes I can see it. They were violent kicks – it was the worst thing I’ve ever seen,” said one witness.
The four suspects are pointing fingers at each other as to who struck the fatal blows that killed Bobby Tillman; but there are no heroes in this mess – just four young men who apparently have no respect for life, and observers who refused to help Tillman.
On Jan. 2, 2002, J. Daniel Scruggs, a Washington Middle School seventh grader into science and magic in Meriden, CT was found hanging by a tie in his closet at the age of 12. The small town was now home to one of the youngest suicides in state history.
His mother, Judith, says her son was having trouble fitting in. He was tiny, weighing only 63 pounds (very small for his age) but he had a high IQ, despite having a learning disability. She was blamed and even prosecuted for evidence that Daniel wore mismatched clothes and smelled like he rarely bathed, but she says it was his way of trying to get out of going to school.
According to Melissa Smith, a school mate, “Every day he was in school he was bullied. People would push him off bleachers, put ‘kick me’ signs on his back, push him around and yell at him. Sometimes teachers would tell the bullies to stop, but other times, they would just dismiss it. They would act like nothing was going on.”
Other kids say he was hit, kicked, spit on, laughed at, thrown down a flight of stairs, and sometimes made to eat his lunch off the cafeteria floor.
From the Cuccia Family Website – Demibrae.com
I am honored to introduce to you my beautiful daughter, Demi.
It is with overwhelming sorrow that I must do so through The Demi Brae Cuccia Awareness Organization.
Demi was brutally murdered in August 2007 by her ex-boyfriend just one day after celebrating her 16th birthday.
My daughter was an exceptionally beautiful young lady with a contagious smile, charming personality and a compassionate, spiritual soul. Her death has broken me beyond repair.
The horrific and unimaginable tragedy that struck our lives and violently ended Demi’s life is today a rapidly growing dangerous epidemic permeating our society.
My mission will be to educate our youth, parents, communities and educational system about the dangers of teen dating violence.
Demi is loved, missed and adored by so many. This organization was founded to honor her memory.
Please follow us…as we learn and grow we will share our knowledge with you through the pages of this site.
-Dr. Gary Cuccia
Hope Witsell was a 13-year-old Florida middle-school student with a tight-knit group of friends who probably shared her passion for the male stars of “Twilight.” She also had plans to become a landscaper someday. But she sent a topless photo of herself to a boy from whom she hoped to get attention. She wound up getting the attention of her school and a nearby high school. Then the bullying started and didn’t let up – proving to be too much for Hope, who hanged herself in her bedroom in September of 2009.
Her death is the second known case of a suicide linked to bullying after “sexting.” Jesse Logan’s was the first.
On a Wednesday afternoon on May 6th 1998, Jared High, a 12 year old sixth grader with special needs was brutally beaten by a school bully almost twice his size.
Because of lack of counseling or appropriate school support after this incident, Jared’s self esteem plummeted and he became deeply depressed. Special needs children really need extra attention when they are taken advantage of or assaulted by larger students, but his school district was negligent in doing so.
Suffering from depression, likely post-traumatic stress disorder, physical injuries comparable to being in an auto crash, sleep problems, “noises in his head,” and a feeling of worthlessness are presumed by his parents to have caused Jared to take his life on September 29th 1998.
Jesse Logan sent nude pictures of herself to a boyfriend. When they broke up, he sent them to other high school girls who then harassed her with names like “slut” and “whore.”
Hurt, miserable and depressed, and afraid to go to school, Jesse connected to a Cincinnati television station in May of 2008 to tell her story. She said, “I just want to make sure no one else will have to go through this again.”
Two months later, Jessica Logan hanged herself and died at age 18.
Justin Aaberg, a 15-year-old Anoka High School student in Minnesota, hanged himself after suffering high school bullying, and after breaking up with his boyfriend.
“These kids, they just hate themselves. They literally feel like they want to die. So many kids are telling me this,” says Tammy Aaberg, mother of Justin, who identified as gay at 13.
Anoka High saw five students kill themselves in a year’s time, and three of those suicides are believed to be tied to struggles with sexual identities. And yet the school district refuses to specifically call out LGBT bullying because apparently, the district believes staff members should “remain neutral” on the subject.
That’s not good enough for moms like Tammy Aaberg, become one of the area’s most vocal supporters of bullying prevention.
There may have been warning signs from Justin, but neither administrators nor teachers – nor even his own mother — picked up on them. And perhaps none of that will change until schools and communities accept that LGBT bullying does occur, is a unique problem, and doesn’t just affect the targeted kids. It affects the entire community.
Megan Meier was looking forward to her 14th birthday and having her braces removed; and when a cute boy contacted her on MySpace, there was a quick connection within a month’s time. “He” was Josh Evans a 16-year-old homeschooled boy who lived nearby. But what began as a sweet friendship suddenly took a turn for the worse … and Megan, who struggled with depression, was devastated.
Tina Meier discovered her daughter’s body in a bedroom closet on Oct. 16, 2006. Megan had hanged herself and died a day later.
Six weeks after Megan’s death, the Meiers learned Josh Evans never existed. The mother of a former friend of Megan’s reportedly created a false profile to gain Megan’s trust and learn what Megan was saying about her daughter.
The Meiers do not believe the woman intended to cause Megan’ suicide, but they do hold her responsible for it. As Megan’s father, Ron Meier, said, “That’s the biggest tragedy of this whole thing: An adult did it.“
Phoebe Prince, entered South Hadley High last fall after moving from Ireland. She was in emotional torment after weeks of being called an “Irish slut” and other names, and also became increasingly worried about “loudly voiced physical threats.”
She told a friend that she was “not a tough girl” and “would not know how to fight,” and at one point she asked friends to surround her as she walked in the hall.
Ms. Prince, a 15-year-old, killed herself after relentless taunting, spending her final days in fear of girls who had threatened to beat her up. Six students were subsequently charged with felonies.
Raymond Chase, 19, a sophomore Johnson and Wales student reported as openly gay, took his own life on a Wednesday … apparently hanging himself in his dorm room.
Many consider this — the fifth suicide by a young gay person in a few weeks time — as a national call to action. According to the Miami Herald, Campus Pride (which recently released a study on attitudes towards LGBT students on campus) issued a statement in reaction to the deaths:
“…the recent pattern of LGBT youth suicides is cause for grave concern. Campus Pride demands national action be taken to address youth bullying, harassment and the need for safety and inclusion for LGBT youth at colleges and universities across the country. We must not let these tragic deaths go unnoticed. Together we must act decisively to curb anti-LGBT bias incidents, harassment and acts of violence.”
A boy had bullied Ryan Halligan since 5th grade, but seemed to befriend him after Ryan stood up to him in seventh grade. But Ryan told the new “friend” something embarrassing and funny that happened once and the boy turned it into “Ryan had something done to him and therefore Ryan must be gay.” Rumors and taunting began that school day, and continued into the night and during the summer of 2003.
To make matters worse, Ryan then attempted an on-line relationship with a pretty “popular” girl from his school only to discover when his 8th grade school year started that — in front of her friends – she would tell him he was a “loser,” and that she was only joking on-line. She thought it funny to make him reveal personal and embarrassing information in instant messages … which she then shared with friends.
Ryan’s hurts and humiliation, now witnessed by a large online audience of adolescents, led to his committing suicide on October 7, 2003.
On a September 19th Sunday, thirteen-year-old Seth Walsh, was found unconscious and not breathing after apparently trying to hang himself from a tree branch. He was airlifted to a local hospital, where he remained on life support for ten days until he died one afternoon surrounded by family. He leaves behind his grandmother Judy Walsh, mother Wendy Walsh, and three siblings, ages 11, 17, and 18.
The Tehachapi, California teen spent the last few years being tormented by classmates at Jacobsen Middle School. He made it only two weeks into the current school year before being transferred to an independent study program.
Police, meanwhile, say they cannot prosecute any of the kids responsible for his torment, since school bullying is not a crime. Tehachapi Police Chief, Jeff Kermode, said “Several of the kids that we talked to broke down into tears. They had never expected an outcome such as this.”
Seth’s death followed 13 year old Asher Brown’s suicide in Texas, and the suicide of 15-year-old Billy Lucas in Indiana.
The body of Siobhan “Shevey” Russell, 19, was discovered by police on an April 12th Easter Sunday in 2009 in a home in the area of Fairfax, VA. Police said she had been fatally stabbed once in the upper torso with a large knife.
Police soon arrested a 17-year-old whom they say was Russell’s boyfriend, and charged him with homicide. The juvenile boy was living at the residence, which belonged to his grandfather, Tom White. Police said they were originally called to the home by the boy’s father, who explained that the two teens may have been arguing over their relationship. The grandfather said in television news reports that his grandson was suffering from some “emotional problems.”
Meanwhile, the murdered Oak Hill teen is remembered by friends and co-workers as a bright, happy girl with enormous potential. She had only just graduated in February from Mountain View Alternative High School in Centreville after having dropped out of school in 2007. During her time at Mountain View, Russell found the school to be a good fit academically and socially.
Before she was killed, Shevey wrote about how much she loved her life and her job. “I hate drama and I avoid confrontations and fights,” she said in the “about me” section of the page.
On a Friday, in Chicago, Eugene Robinson, 27, entered an Old Navy store about 11 a.m., shooting Tranesha Palms, 22, a female employee before turning the gun on himself. The two bodies were found in an employee-only basement area of the store.
The victim and the shooter had lived together in the 10200 block of South Walden Parkway, and had a 2-year-old child together. Now the child is being looked after by the dead woman’s mother.
This undated photo from Facebook shows Tyler Clementi, who allegedly committed suicide after two Rutgers University students taped and broadcast him having sex.
The situation described and the date of the following post appears to indicate that Tyler was most likely the person responsible for it. It read:“So the other night I had a guy over. I had talked to my roommate that afternoon and he had said it would be fine w/him,” cit2mo wrote. “I checked his twitter today. He tweeted that I was using the room … and that he went into somebody else’s room and remotely turned on his webcam and saw me making out with a guy.“
Clementi is believed to have jumped off the George Washington Bridge shortly after the message was posted. His wallet was found on the bridge, and his car was nearby. Through a statement issued by a lawyer, Clementi’s family confirmed that he had committed suicide.
Investigators suspect Clementi committed suicide because of the Internet broadcast.
On Sunday, May 2, 22 year-old Yeardley Love, a fourth-year defender on the women’s lacrosse team, was discovered at about 2 AM by her roommate and teammate, Caitlin Whitely, and a friend lying face down on a bed and unresponsive. They called 911.
The police arrived and, on turning Love over, saw a pool of blood beneath her head, bruises on her face and her right eye swollen shut — the result of “blunt force trauma.“ She was pronounced dead at the scene.
The investigation quickly led police to the nearby apartment of George Huguely, a fourth year letterman on the men’s lacrosse team with male-model looks. He had dated Love, but they had recently broken up. After being taken to Charlottesville police headquarters, he waived his Miranda rights and shared details of his assault on Love. He has been charged with her murder.
In October 2010, a week after attending a Norman (OK) City Council meeting where a heated debate played out in public about a proclamation recognizing October as Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender History Month in the city, 19-year-old Zach Harrington took his own life at his family’s home in Norman.
Harrington’s family, who described him as a private young man who internalized his feelings and emotions, said it was this “toxic” environment at the Sept. 28 council meeting that may have pushed their gay son and brother over the edge. Harrington’s father, Van, said he feels his son may have glimpsed a hard reality at the meeting listening to the same attitudes that tormented him in high school being shouted and applauded by adults the same age as his parents.
Zach had been struggling with acceptance for years — despite being a talented musician “who could play any instrument he picked up,” Van Harrington said his son asked to leave Norman North High School early during his senior year and finish his diploma in a separate program.
“He feared for his safety and [that of] other people like him,” Van said. “Even though he was 6-4, he was passive and I’m sure being gay in that environment didn’t help.”
…unfortunately this list continues to grow.
…this is why we do what we do.
-Robert Simon
Violence Prevention Specialist
Start Strong Wichita – a project of Catholic Charities Wichita
