The other day I watched an episode of a popular teen show. To sum it up: the girl became jealous because her boyfriend showed interest in another girl and so she thought in order to keep him from leaving her she gets all dolled up and “gives in” to what he’s been asking for. And did she keep her boyfriend? Of course. Typical teen tv show plot, right?
And that’s the problem. Teens see this situation over and over again. The gender roles could be reversed but the fact is they believe that when things get tough we should avoid the problem and use sex as a distraction. And the worse thing is that tv shows don’t show the consequences of this behavior. They basically say, “Sure, it’s alright to lower your values and self-respect…..as long as you keep the guy.” What happened to communication? What happened to honesty? Is it “lame” to actually work through our problems nowadays?
Unfortunately, this is what many teens base their relationships on. The media tells teens that sex and ignorance is the way to go when things get hard. I don’t know a lot about relationships but I know that communication is key. But when shows air these kinds of situations they portray girls as play things and don’t teach them to respect themselves no matter what. What the media is blind to is the fact that this idea transcends into the real world. Do you know what happens to the girl on the tv show? Did she get pregnant? Does her boyfriend end up cheating on her? No. Nothing happens to her. She keeps the guy and her life goes on. But in reality, girls aren’t so lucky. TV shows don’t show the consequences of thses actions; how lowering your self-respect just to keep a guy from breaking up with you only ends up hurting you in the long run. Exchanging love for yourself in order to get “love” from a guy? I don’t think that’s a fair trade.
I’m not writing just to spread word of this problem. I have a solution for tv writers and producers. Simply show the consequences. I understand that tv shows are all about drama but who says they can’t be realistic? Sure, I probably can’t relate to a rich teen socialite in Manhattan but I can sure relate to the woe she has of suspecting her boyfriend is cheating on her. So when I watch her “give in” to her boyfriend just to keep him around but then later see her realize that it wasn’t worth it in the end, I’ll be sure to keep that in my mental list of “Things not to do in a Relationship.” Because although the characters aren’t real, their problems sure are. And even though teens can’t write a script for their own lives, they sure can edit it on the way.
-Duyen Vo
Start Strong Wichita Student Leader – TAP
