Spot “Real Girls” Before It’s Too Late!

Spot “Real Girls” Before It’s Too Late!

Trust us.  Real girls are out there … and they are WAY more valuable than the ones you might think you want.  But make sure you know how to spot real girls … and then appreciate them.

 

• Real girls look in the mirror and figure out ways to take the physical body they were born with and work on making it healthy first, attractive second.  But they don’t do it by trying to create themselves in the image of some “ideal girl” that may be taller, shorter, skinnier, plumper, or shaped differently than the natural shape she was born with.  They know that real beauty comes in many different forms.

 

• Real girls have flaws, but they work on changing the flaws that allow them to be better people, and accepting the ones that make them unique without taking away from them being their best selves.

 

• Real girls have unique beauties that they can cultivate, but they also have unique intelligences, creativity, dreams, preferences, personalities, voices, and more.  If you can’t be happy with the whole package, don’t bother.  Real girls are not going to reduce themselves to the one or two dimensions that are your favorites and let go of the other parts of them that matter.

 

• Real girls are as beautiful on the inside as they are on the outside.  Even if you are lucky enough to get the interest of a girl that is so gorgeous physically that she makes your eyes hurt, be sure to dig deep beneath the outside package.  It’s what is on the inside that will matter when the pretty package is not as pretty anymore.

 

• Real girls are looking for real guys … so don’t be afraid to be yourself wherever you go.  If you have to put on a front to get a girl’s attention, you better be prepared to grow into the person you are pretending to be.

 

• Real girls are always learning and growing … and learning and growing take a certain amount of time.  Make sure that you are learning and growing, too, and don’t expect to hang on to a real girl if the two of you start to grow in different directions or at speeds that are too different.  Even if you fall hard for a real girl, realize that what’s real for the two of you today could change tomorrow or next year.  You have to figure out what kind of relationship race you are in and realize it’s not just about how fast or how well you go in the first part, but also how well you run in the middle … and at the end.

 

• Real girls will not let you treat them with disrespect … and they will tell you when you do … and expect you to quickly and permanently learn to treat them better.  Do it … or take a hike, and get to work on your respect issues … because you definitely have them.

 

• Real girls understand that not every guy is right for them and not every relationship is meant to last forever.  If she says she needs space … or time … or that it’s not working … or it’s over … respect that.  Ask lots of questions so you can get an understanding; but if it’s not something the two of you can fix together, move on.  She’s either not the real girl for you … or it’s not the right time for you to be real together.

 

Without a doubt, there are other characteristics that real girls have.  This is not a complete list, but it will get you started.  Just know that once you learn to spot (and then get interested in) a real girl, make sure you work at figuring out how to earn her respect and love.  Even if the two of you wind up going your separate ways, that respect and love will go with you for the rest of your life … and make it WAY more likely that you’ll be able to land the real girl that’s perfect for you … when your time comes.

 

And in the meantime, you and the folks who interest you are much less likely to become the latest teen dating violence statistic.

Robert Simon
Violence Prevention Specialist
Start Strong Wichita